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The Hopkinton Commons by ~jovegathering:iconjovegathering:



Early afternoon pastoral and fresh, on white posts we prop
Ourselves sit sun-streaked upon ripples of openings,
Perforations filled by the long bends of slanted sun,
Supports that keep structure to the lift of summer air.

As light lays upon the rolling hills of our bodies,
As bottoms rest peacefully upon gazebos
Middled in old cement.

Nature's kaleidoscope;
Projection symmetries onto the ceiling,
Lineations of the atmosphere interchange
By the lense of each passing hour.
As flower petals and tree bushes grow quiet,
We are privileged to the scented colors
entering our filaments eyes and nose.

Ribbons of our chemical nexus rise
in spaces heart opened,
Ridden throughout venations-
Soldering within like melted irragations-
Shaping the earths current.

An oval projection concentrated beneath the surface
like starburst arms or tree branches stretching,
And Love plummets down to the reeve tips of her ocean floor,
Cycles evaporating bottom to top and resting in love again.

Birds rest atop gazebo sills, catch light for
Cheek bridges to omit tilting into shaded eyes.
We rest and listen to bell sounds;
vibrato noises voluminous in their vocal banners
eradicating into the atmosphere by a thousand drapings
coating the air and swarming like honey bees.
Falling and lifting again.
©2005-2009 ~jovegathering
:iconjovegathering:

Author's Comments

A lovely evening of my first night in New England, with the lovely largesse of Hopkinton.

Comments


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:icondariannox:
I really liked the feel of everything between-
"Early afternoon pastoral and fresh" and "We are priveledged to the scented colors"

The next bit loses me somewhat, the feeling seems to go off on an unknown tangent.

Until-
"We rest and listen to bell sounds;
vibrato noises voluminous in their vocal banners
eradicating into the atmosphere by a thousand drapings
coating the air and swarming like honey bees.
Falling and lifting again."

Which I love! Hope this helps when you edit. Can I say again that I am courting your turn of phrase? Maybe one day I can capture it.
:icondrank-poison:
I really like this poem, the language is very beautiful. I did, however, feel like the subject of the poem was rather vague. I couldn't exactly see the picture you were trying to portray... I saw little bits of it, little pieces of a larger picture, but I never actually saw it come together.

However, your language is amazing, very deep and rich and varied. Very good job. Keep up the good work!

--
"Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live."
-Oscar Wilde

[DRN]
:iconbysshe:
I love thos ppoem, I'm given you ten out of ten for both mood and vocabulary. Gazebo throws it off a little but this is still a firm :fav+:

--
i liek caek
:iconookamiinu:
*Nods* Very nice
You have capture the true mood and also the words you use flow elegantly with your poem
I hope to see more in the future ^^

--
Don't Hate and Fear, for They follow you in the shadows, until your death is done!

As time goes by...I will know more...By the time I die...I will feel more...

98% of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2% who hasn't, copy an
:iconengel08:
beautiful words and good use of vocabulary. A lovely poem for a lovely day.

--
\
:iconmutedillusion:
This is absolutely gorgeous. The essence is carefree and the words and the images really took me away. I love the scheme you use and the feelings you put into the poem at certain times. :+fav:

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June 27, 2005
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